Unemployed and Loving It?

I was informed last week that my current job is being eliminated. I just got back from vacation; before I left my boss threatened to suspend me for a week for taking a long lunch and being insubordinate(I live right down the street from the office).

The fact is I am underpaid, I have been for years but I do not have a leg to stand on because I should be grateful to have a job. Suspending me was ridiculous especially if you can't pay me anyway, that is the way things turned out- no vacation pay- they got their free hours out of me and I should be grateful to hang around and use the computer. I don't want to even get into advertising commissions and the upcoming storm developing around that. All I know if anyone is getting paid and I'm not, it is criminal.

I am valuable to my organization because of my low wage. If I had a degree I would have more market value; I would also be a financial burden. It is a catch 22. I would rather just volunteer, come in when I want, not be obligated to do anything; then I would not complain.

Because of all the promises I can be justified in my frustration; I could wallow in the truth of MY story. I like what I do regardless of money. What I don't like is being taken for granted and I cannot help but feel that way. I have watched other people step in and make more than I do with half the responsibility after I was promised a raise multiple times.

It went from "Hell, we'll take out a mortgage on our building ,you are going to get your raise" to "Guys I don't know how we are going to pay you" in seven days.

All the while daycare just increased to $145.00 per week. It is no secret why people turn to crime. My rent is due and I have no vacation or regular paycheck. Oh yeah, I got an 'advance'? on my commission. That translates to you are getting no more money. It will be a MIRACLE if i get paid.

For some of you this may be TMI but I have to vent or I will snap.

Two years ago I took the responsibility to help facilitate The Study Buddy Club. At the time it was sixty kids, some not even in school or chronic truants. The program was in disarray, in fact, I am sure if it would have continued without some sort of intervention the program would have been cut short. Study Buddy would surely be gone.


I got rid of the riff-raff; I was riff-raff so I am qualified to make that assessment. We set some standards for grades and behavior.The framework, was there-the program was in its third year- but the manpower wasn't; that is where my value comes in. I basically did it for free. I was liberated as a result and found myself enrolled in a powerful idea.

My needs have been lost in that idea I am becoming the very charity case that we deal with. People that need jobs, education, help paying their rent.

It is sad. I am now a charity case.